MOVING ON




Whenever you undergo major changes in your life that's just traumatic, we always seek the wisdom of our friends. Thinking that they know us the best, these people will give you pieces of advice that will make sense right?! I mean how can it not make sense if they know what you've been through? They know you. Or do they?

One of the most common advice I'd get whenever I go through break-ups is for me to "move on". In human talk, this means that I should not waste a single second thinking about what happened and even analyzing every single angle of it. It could also mean that I should pay attention to now is "more important aspect of my life". To all of my friends, I want to thank you for trying really hard to be a good friend to me in my times of need. I appreciate every single minute of it. *wink*

What I'm going to write about today are things that every good friend who says "move on" should know. Again, although we know the purest intention of this piece of advice, it would help us all to realize the other side of these two words. Let's start.


MOVING ON REALITY #1: It's f*ckin' HARD to do.

I know that when you say it, you want us to do it right away. My Dear Friend, it's not easy. It's so difficult to move on while you're in pain. Sometimes, keeping the pain where it hurts the most is the only thing we could do. We have to think about it. We have to know how it started and then cry about it.

MOVING ON REALITY #2: We don't know where to start.

Does it start with dating again? Brushing our teeth again? A brand new haircut? We don't know. We really don't. Because at this point, we don't know what feels good.

MOVING ON REALITY #3: Most of the time, we fail.

After you tell us what to do and then we do it, it doesn't mean everything goes back to normal. When you're no longer watching, we cry again. We think again. We cry again. It doesn't mean you failed. We failed.


When I recently went through a break-up, my friends were very nice to me. They were very supportive. Of course they gave their pieces of advice but you know what's the best part? When they just listened to me and really heard me out. That quiet embrace? It was my little piece of heaven. It's the thing that made me forget. It's the thing that made me realize that I will move on in ways only me could figure out...



Toni

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